I’m finding myself at a low point in my life again. I’ve got an ideal job that I’m good at, even praised for, a decent wage even if I don’t know how much it might be month to month. My job isn’t hard, just long hours (I’m a live in carer), in a beautiful part of Kent in South East England, yet I’m getting these feelings of “Whats the point” and “I just don’t care”. Yesterday I nearly ran over a little kid who didn’t brake in time at a road junction. I know I’d feel terrible if I’d ran her over, but if I were to drop down dead now, that wouldn’t bother me. I’m not actively looking for a way to kill myself, but I’m just so down right now and I know that logically, I’ve got very little reason to complain or feel the way I’m feeling. I’m looking at switching jobs to one nearer home, but even then. I’m not exactly sure how to express what I’m feeling except to use the word “meh!”, which just doesn’t seem enough reason for how I’m feeling.